"Originality"

You remember Only Up? That famous game on Steam where you go only up? Yeah that game. That game doesn't exist anymore. Okay well it does. Its page is still technically on Steam. Though it's been renamed to "not available" and was taken off the Steam store. However... there is another game on Steam called... "Only Up !". And it has a shit ton of negative reviews... How could it? Surely it's unique compared to the original game right?

Oh... I think I see now why. I can't even figure out where the fuck I am supposed to go. Yep. That's where all the bad reviews come in. Now you would think that as soon as you get started that there's maybe a ramp or like some bigger platforms you can jump up to get started. But no. I'm here running around naked. Trying to find SOMEWHERE to go. Maybe a staircase or what seems like a ledge I can climb but... no! I don't know where the fuck I am going. It is WAY too fucking open world. Hell I was even surprised I DID realize where to go. And it really was in a spot you would never fucking guess. There's like this slightly jagged stone wall with graffiti on it. Big white letters. Kind of hard to make out what it says. But you go straight across to where you see some cars stacked up. If you can make it up to the platform on top, it's all up from there. And you can make it to the pipes section holy fuck it is just the original Only Up. I wasn't successful my first time on them. Though thankfully I didn't really make it far up on them to begin with. My 2nd try, I was WAY more careful. I was more shocked I didn't fall off them even with the times it felt scarily close. I can't remember if there was a train section in the original. I kind of feel like there was? It had been a long ass time since I played the original Only Up. But I make it to the minecart section... really glad I could see where I was going. Yeah there were a few times the camera decided to join me in the cart. Thankfully though there wasn't a part I had to jump off or I would fall. I run across the floating train tot he next section. And here is where I got a little confused and stuck. I really had no idea where I was going from here and there seemed to be a shit load of invisible walls. I thought maybe the ladder is what I had to climb but nope that wasn't the case. I am embarrassed I didn't realize the skinny tube I could talk across in the KEEP OUT area. This one I had to be SUPER careful on. One wrong step and I was dead. Thankfully after that is an area with considerably thicker pipes. So that's nice. The steel bar section is sadly where I never made it past. And when I tried to recover falling back to the meteor below me? The fucking game was glitching and I was somehow mantling to invisible spaces 10 years away from said meteor!

I was... to lightly put it... fucked. Not like I fell all the way back down. But I was still pissed. Unfortunately, my 2nd go at the steel bars wasn't much better. I made it a little further up. But alas 1 short jump and yeah I was back at truly the beginning. With a nice loud as fuck respawn sound. I'm sorry was that a Fortnite rift sound? Unfortunately I was not able to actually find again where the start point was. And even when I tried, I just randomly respawned again? Making myself deaf again? Okay sure yeah I'm done. Of course now that I do know where to go, I will probably return to this game again someday. Though I'll probably need to dedicate a day to spend a lot of time on it. Because guess what? This game has no auto-save! WAHOO!

People who make saveless games need to be sent to Mars and never brought back.