Thanks again Game Grumps!

Yeah so I saw the Game Grumps play Super Video Golf and I was like... hey that game looks like fun! So I got it. And Dollar Store Mr. Wheel has given it to me for game 53 of The Winter Jackpot.

After going through a tutorial, teaching me the ropes of the game, like hole distance, clubs, wind, aim, power, oh yeah when that black bar is moving, you got one shot to reach the middle, you can't just wait and time it. After also learning spin and learning how to read the green, and using the distance tool, and getting a triple bogey, I was feeling confident going into a Golfing career! Country Club Tour. Round 1: Sunny Cove, Weald & Hedgeways. Oh yeah these damn bots won't know what hit them. After properly setting the difficulty, it was time to get going! Hole number 1. Looks like... a dude falling backwards. Because I am such a fucking noob at this game and that I can't hit a 174 centimeter putt, I end up getting Double Bogey on this. Off to a good start! Hole 2, uh... skinny alien leaning forward. It's a very straight long course. I do end up doing just a bit better. Getting Par on this course. Hole 3 is a very baseball bat looking course with a patch of fairway at the bottom and top and a lot of rough in the middle. It was good until the end when I mishit my putt horribly. Hopefully hole 4, club on top of boomerang goes better. At least I get Par on going to hole 5. Right now I am 3 over par and tied for 11th place. Oh boy. Hole 5, the i course, I get my very first BIRD in this career. Well I'll definitely take that. Hole 6, the more curvy i course. I also get BIRD here. I think I am definitely and very quickly getting the hang of this game. Hole 7, I don't know dude... the bottom half of a pregnant woman. Yes I am really getting creative with what these holes look like. I must've done really well here given the fact that I got EGGS Going into hole 8? I'm tied for 2nd now at 1 under! Don't call it a comeback! Oh yeah... uh... sneezing dude. Another BIRD achieved on this hol. And lastly, hole 9 is... fat dude leaning forward. How does green sound on my first fucking stroke? EGGS for me here and I finish the round in clean sole first! Hell yeah! I end up getting a 5 wood and level badge out of it as I head to round 2. I was a little confused at first thinking why I was playing the same holes again. But I guess that's just how things work here. Westington Links, Isle of Pendale. Looking back I realized I forgot to change my difficulty. Ah well I don't think it makes much of a difference. Between Casual and Regular.

Hole 1, dude leaning forwards and backwards! At the same time! Woah! Despite me getting BIRD, Howie somehow ended up with eggs. I don't fucking know how. He's in 1st place. I don't like that. As for hole 2, yet another i, getting birdie ties me now for 1st. And poor Howie is tied for 3rd at 0. Somehow got double bogey on hole 2. Hole 3... uh... dude who looks like they are about to sit to take a shit. Another BIRD puts me alone in 1st. Hole 4... woah everything is going on with this hole. I don't know... dude T-Posing. Right on the head after 1 stroke and a BIRD achieved going into hole 5. Dude with bad back. I don't know would a BIRD help with that? Hole 6, a really skinny equals sign. I am just killing it with the BIRDs here. Hole 7... looks like a sleepy dude who just really wants to lie in bed. Hah! Like me! XD! Guess I am so sleepy that I kiss the rim of the hole and fucking miss it. Dammit. Guess my luck can only be good for so long. I'll settle for par going to hole 8. Someone squished my lower case j. At least I can get BIRD here. Hole 9, busted boomerang. After thinking the wind would help push my ball back to the green, I end up taking par here. At least I still finished 1st by a long shot. It wasn't even close. I was 7 under, next closest was Cleftwhistle at 1 under. I CRUSHED the bot competition! XD! One more, round 3: Sunny Cove, Weald & Hedgeways. This time the back 9 of the holes. Not so sunny here when it's raining on hole 10. Floating peanut. It may be raining but I can still get BIRDs! Hole 11, a very... distorted lower case j. It might be distorted but I still get bird. Hole 12... I'd call it j but now I'll call it a semi-colon. Oh yeah, doinking off the flag pole is very possible. Par on this one. Hole 13, bottom half of a dude who looks like they're about to kick you in the nuts. Amazingly I somehow just BARELY get BIRD. I thought the ball wasn't going to go in. But it decided to be nice and go in for me going into hole 14. Looks like... what it looks like when a person is flung so hard going forward where it has that weird forwards arch. Oh and they're on the phone too. Well once again the hole kisses the fucking rim but doesn't go in the hole. Bogey takes me out of 1st place. Well now I have to go back into 1st. Hole 15 is... a floating lightbulb above a potato. Can't miss a 92 centimeter putt for BIRD

Hole 16 is a dude who is pretending they are the damn easter bunny. Also yes it's very much possible to make your ball soar right over trees. I don't know why I didn't think that was possible. Still get pa... nevermind I get bogey. Can't make a 22 centimeter putt for shit. Still up by 2 though. Hole 17 has a big ass. Still up 1 after getting par there going to the final hole. It's like real golf courses when you reach the final hole and it's right next to the front building. As much as it looked like I was ending this on a BIRD, the ball said... no... fuck you. And rolled away. And I end up tying this round for 1st.

Yeah well fuck you too ball.